"When we believe or say we have been offended, we usually mean we feel insulted, mistreated, snubbed, or disrespected. And certainly clumsy, embarrassing, unprincipled, and mean-spirited things do occur in our interactions with other people that would allow us to take offense. However, it ultimately is impossible for another person to offend you or to offend me. Indeed, believing that another person offended us is fundamentally false. To be offended is a choice we make; it is not acondition inflicted or imposed upon us by someone or something else.
In the grand division of all of God’s creations, there are things to act and things to be acted upon (see 2 Nephi 2:13–14). As sons and daughters of our Heavenly Father, we have been blessed with the gift of moral agency, the capacity for independent action and choice. Endowed with agency, you and I are agents, and we primarily are to act and not just be acted upon. To believe that someone or something can make us feel offended, angry, hurt, or bitter diminishes our moral agency and transforms us into objects to be acted upon. As agents, however, you and I have the power to act and to choose how we will respond to an offensive or hurtful situation.
"David A. Bednar in the November 2006 Conference called "And Nothing Shall Offend Them". I quote:
The idea of 'acting' versus 'being acted upon' is a really cool concept that you can think a lot about. Every time we choose to not get angry, offended, upset, or bitter towards someone we are choosing to act instead of being acted upon. I am grateful that the example Jesus Christ gave was to act, and that by acting we not only better ourselves but are more capable to serve others and bring to pass our missionary purpose. I love this church and I love this restored gospel. I love you all lots too!
-Anziano Benjamin Smith
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