“Detaching from the addict is extremely difficult to do, especially if he or she has just embarrassed you, hurt you, or stolen from you. But keep in mind that what is most important to your salvation is what you do regardless of the addict’s behavior. Codependents can measure the level of their recovery by discovering their ability to act and to feel according to their relationship with God, whatever the addict’s behavior. Achieving some level of detachment (and that doesn’t mean that you don’t care) allows the codependent to add the additional ingredients to an effective strategy.
Hold on to Hope, p 124
Letting go or Detaching means:
Is not to enable but allow learning from natural consequences.
Is not to care for, but to care about.
Is not to fix, but to be supportive.
Is not to be protective, but to permit another to face reality.
Is not to regret the past, but to grow and live for the future.
Is to fear less and to love more.